MomMaw fell down in December 2005. Until then she was completely self-sufficient. She drove everywhere, bought and cooked her own food, she cleaned her house (and I swear dust was afriad to show itself in her home). Just a bit of arthritis in her right hand, so my other g'mother helped her write checks for bills. She was always worried whether or not she would have enough money to last her the rest of her life because she didn't want to go to a nursing home.
While she was in the hospital, I talked to her almost daily, and she asked that my sister not be told where she was. But the other g'ma did tell, and in two days - count 'em - TWO - sister came down to WV and left a life behind, though I would call it an existence.
Dear daughter says don't use names because of libel. So until the mess is settled we'll say RC (pretend it stands for Robber/Crook).
Really quick, RC's name got added to MomMaw's bank accounts (cause she would help write checks, ya know) and had my name taken off (which had been on the accounts for like 8 years) at Boone County Bank in Madison - accounts with a balance of $142,995.91.
MomMaw called the bank and asked that transactions from her account be stopped. She was told things such as "We can't check every check that comes through here" and "If a check is presented we don't know who signed it, we have to take it" as to why they couldn't protect her life savings.
At least once a week MomMaw called me and begged me for help because she was losing her money so quickly. The AD told me to come up there and help her by getting Power of Attorney, MomMaw agreed, and on July 13, 2007, I drove to West Virginia, MomMaw signed Power of Attorney papers authorizing me as POA, I filed them at the courthouse, and went to the bank to withdraw what was left of her life savings - $39,482.26.
That's over ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND dollars in just over a year. MomMaw never spent more than $1500 a month. Tax time and Christmas may have pushed it close to $2000 but she was not extravagent - she grew up very poor and didn't waste money. She wanted to have enough to last her the rest of her life.
Regarding the bank - suspected financial exploitation is elderly abuse, which is supposed to be mandatorily reported to senior agencies. Just like child abuse is supposed to be reported by certain people - like teachers, doctors, nurses - it's the law, and it's actually against the law not to report it. Shouldn't we all treat elderly with as much or MORE respect than we treat children? If it takes a village to raise a child, shouldn't the village look after the grandparents and great-grands of those childen? I believe that if you see someone getting hurt and you do nothing, you may as well be the abuser.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Sunday, March 22, 2009
So the beginning...
This is a story that begins like non-fiction... and the ending (tho' it's not yet ended) could rival a fiction story. It begins oh-so mundane and so loving, and in the last chapters it's horrific. I wish I could write a story like this - but the reader would think that it is too tragic and I wouldn't sell any books. This story is insane - I am living it and MomMaw died by it.
My grandmother, Glenna Mae Adkins, was born and bred in West-by-God Virginia. A true southern lady - she had manners, a sense of propriety, all of the old-fashioned theories that most Southern women of the Depression Era held in common.
Long story short - I was raised by MomMaw most of my young years, and in teen years too. She was my mom in the truest sense of the word. Because of a troubled family, we had a bond that was granddaughter/grandma, child/mom, confidant/counselor. I just looked through a box of letters I've kept since the 80's, and she wrote me a letter at least once a month (and when I was young and poor she sent $50 a month - religiously - and apologized when it was a couple of days late!) Even when I didn't need the money any more, she sent it anyway and told me to use it on my daughter.
After I moved to Florida in 1987, I went home every year to visit. And West Virginia has always seemed like home - the flat expanses and even the beaches of Florida can't compare with WV's rolling mountains, the quiet forests, the palettes of trees that were painted by God. Every year - by air then later by car (it's a helluva drive - I have no sense of direction and somehow seem to get lost every damn trip). I went in the summer - a couple of years we went twice a year for Thanksgiving - and it recharged my soul to be home in the mountains and HOME with MomMaw.
So when she was troubled, I turned to West Virginia to help. The Senior Citizen's agency, the courthouse, her bank, the police - state and county, anyone who was supposed to be looking after an elderly person. No dice. From anywhere. They turned their backs on her and now ignore her existence. The one true person in my life, the constant, my heart - and they screwed her.
My grandmother, Glenna Mae Adkins, was born and bred in West-by-God Virginia. A true southern lady - she had manners, a sense of propriety, all of the old-fashioned theories that most Southern women of the Depression Era held in common.
Long story short - I was raised by MomMaw most of my young years, and in teen years too. She was my mom in the truest sense of the word. Because of a troubled family, we had a bond that was granddaughter/grandma, child/mom, confidant/counselor. I just looked through a box of letters I've kept since the 80's, and she wrote me a letter at least once a month (and when I was young and poor she sent $50 a month - religiously - and apologized when it was a couple of days late!) Even when I didn't need the money any more, she sent it anyway and told me to use it on my daughter.
After I moved to Florida in 1987, I went home every year to visit. And West Virginia has always seemed like home - the flat expanses and even the beaches of Florida can't compare with WV's rolling mountains, the quiet forests, the palettes of trees that were painted by God. Every year - by air then later by car (it's a helluva drive - I have no sense of direction and somehow seem to get lost every damn trip). I went in the summer - a couple of years we went twice a year for Thanksgiving - and it recharged my soul to be home in the mountains and HOME with MomMaw.
So when she was troubled, I turned to West Virginia to help. The Senior Citizen's agency, the courthouse, her bank, the police - state and county, anyone who was supposed to be looking after an elderly person. No dice. From anywhere. They turned their backs on her and now ignore her existence. The one true person in my life, the constant, my heart - and they screwed her.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
The Poisoned Apple
Okay, everyone has a bad apple in the family... and if you're super lucky that apple is a few orchards behind you. Unfortunately, I have a bad apple who came off of the tree that Eve ate from. Yep, she teaches Satan how to be evil. There's been too much harassment, too many threats, and too-long complacency that I finally have to document this. And yeah baby it's got a paper trail...
MomMaw has paid already. With her home, her life savings, and her life. In the great state of West By-God, it's been completely ignored -
"She's not complainin' so there's not no abuse" - Social Services, April 2006
"She's got food and her house is clean, we can't find nothin' wrong" - Police, June 2007
"Your sister treats your grandma like shit" - Sister's boyfriend, April 2008
"We been to her house many times cause the neighbors heard her screamin'" - Policeman, September 2008
This is a blog that can't really help anyone that's going through my situation, not if it's a small town or idiots run the place, whatever size the town. In my case, Local Yokels don't care, even though MomMaw has lived in the same county for her 80+ years. (There's a lot of influence in boppin' a cop and partyin' with officials!) I have to write this because I don't have many options, and I have to document something, somehow. I won't write anything that's not true, either supported by court documentation or accounts by others - and this will be scary. This could be considered R-rated, my 11 year old can't read this - she knows most of it of course, but to see it all together is freaky.
MomMaw has paid already. With her home, her life savings, and her life. In the great state of West By-God, it's been completely ignored -
"She's not complainin' so there's not no abuse" - Social Services, April 2006
"She's got food and her house is clean, we can't find nothin' wrong" - Police, June 2007
"Your sister treats your grandma like shit" - Sister's boyfriend, April 2008
"We been to her house many times cause the neighbors heard her screamin'" - Policeman, September 2008
This is a blog that can't really help anyone that's going through my situation, not if it's a small town or idiots run the place, whatever size the town. In my case, Local Yokels don't care, even though MomMaw has lived in the same county for her 80+ years. (There's a lot of influence in boppin' a cop and partyin' with officials!) I have to write this because I don't have many options, and I have to document something, somehow. I won't write anything that's not true, either supported by court documentation or accounts by others - and this will be scary. This could be considered R-rated, my 11 year old can't read this - she knows most of it of course, but to see it all together is freaky.
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